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啪啪免费观看大全av狠狠在线插口日日干日日啪日韩在线京沪常住人口负增长 “逃离”的人去哪了?

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可是剛寫了開頭幾行,我就不覺停筆,耽于奇特的遐想了。我停止書寫, —我只求一點︰只求你原諒,完全忘記已經發生的一切,忘記我跟你說的話, 我所暴露的感情。只請你給我這一個慰藉,只請你給我這一個小小的可憐的 確切信息!請你馬上告訴我,你只要說一句話,我就已經滿足了。你只要說, 你並不討厭我,你還會到我們家里來,就仿佛什麼事也沒有發生似的︰你想 象不出我是多麼擔心會失去你。自從房門在你身後關上之時起,我也不知道 為什麼,有一種致命的恐懼折磨著我,生伯這是最後一次見面。在我放開你 的那一刻,你的臉色是多麼蒼白,眼楮里含著多麼大的驚恐,我雖然身在熊 熊烈焰之中,心里卻突然變得冰冷了。我知道——僕人已經告訴我了——你 馬上就逃出了我們家,一下子你就不見了,還有你的佩刀,你的軍帽。他徒 然去找你,在我屋里找,到處都找。于是我知道,你逃走了。你逃避我,就 像逃避麻風病,就像逃避黑死病。可是不,親愛的,我不是責備你,我是理 解你的啊!我只要看見我那像兩條木棍似的腿,自己都會嚇一大跳。惟有我, 恰好只有我知道,我在煩惱焦灼的時候,變得多麼凶惡,多麼怪僻,多麼折 磨人,多麼叫人難以忍受。恰好只有我最能理解,人家看見我會嚇一跳—— 啊,我非常理解,既然人家看見我都會嚇得逃走,那麼這樣一個怪物如果去 襲擊別人,人家一定會嚇得退避三舍。然而我還是要懇求你原諒我,因為如 果沒有你,我就既無白晝也無黑夜,只有一片絕望。請你送張紙條給我,一 張小小的紙條,隨手寫上幾筆,或者給我一張白紙,一朵花,不管什麼樣的 表示都行!只要給我一點什麼東西,我從中看出,你並不擯斥我,你並不討 厭我。請你想一想,過幾天我就動身走了,一去就是幾個月,再過八天,十 天,你受的折磨就到頭了。盡管接著我將開始受到成千倍的折磨,忍受幾個 星期、幾十月的不得不失去你的痛苦,可是我並不去想這些,我只是思念你, 就像一直以來那樣思念你,我只想你!——八天之後你就解脫了——所以請 你再來一次吧,來之前給我捎句話,給我一個表示!只要我不知道你是否已 經原諒我了,那我就一刻也不能思想,不能呼吸,不能感覺。倘若你拒絕給 我愛你的權利,那我不願意再活下去,也不可能再活下去了。”啪啪免费观看大全av 我當時是怎麼回到城里去的,這事我永遠也搞不清楚了。我只知道,我 當時走得很快,隨著我的脈搏的每一下跳動,只有一個念頭在一再重復︰快 走!快走!快離開這座府邸,脫離這個圈套。快逃,快跑,跑得無影無蹤! 永遠不要再踏進這座別墅,永遠不要再看見這些人,根本什麼人也不要再見! 躲起來,誰也不讓看見,對誰也不再承擔義務,再也不卷進任何圈套里去! 我知道,我當時還試圖繼續往下想︰辭去軍職,到什麼地方去尋些錢來,然 後逃到異國他鄉,遠走高飛,這荒謬的要求再也夠不著我;然而這一切與其 說是經過深思熟慮的清清楚楚的思想,毋寧說是朦朧模糊的夢想,因為在這 過程中我的太陽穴里只有一句話像鐵錘似地敲個不停,走,走,走,快走吧! 後來從我那布滿灰塵的鞋和褲子上被薊草劃破的口子看出,我大概在草 地、田野、馬路上亂跑了一陣。反正等我最後走上大路的時候,太陽已經偏 西,落到了屋頂後面。有人猝不及防地從背後拍拍我的肩膀,我的確像個夢狠狠在线插口日日干 過,因為您的態度是那樣的??那樣的落落大方,那樣的親切,這可完全是 另外一種樣子。我從最初的時刻起就擔心,在您這兒只是同情而已。可是我 又怎麼能向這可憐的孩子發出警告,怎麼能這樣殘忍,把那使她幸福的痴心 妄想從她心里驅走??幾個星期以來,她活著僅僅只有一個念頭,那就是 您??她一個勁地問我,我是否認為,您是真的喜歡她,我總不能粗暴地對 待她??我總得安慰她,增強她的信念。” “現在你走吧,走吧,你這傻瓜??走吧!”日日啪日韩在线 我想,還得過二十幾年,才能真正保險開車出門不出毛病。還是騎我們出色 的老式駿馬來得簡單,我們這號人至少對騎馬還懂得那麼一星半點。”

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